Had science paper 1 today as well as chem paper 2. sigh. i dont think i'm gonna do well or pass for today's paper. i regretted not studying enough!! i hate myself!! its already mid year. why am i not working hard enough? people is already working hard. and me? what am i doing? still slacking? i really dunno what i should do. i seems so distracted at times. i cant study at home, i cant study at cousin's house. sometimes i cant study outside with friends either. what should i do? sigh. why i cant concentrate on chem nowadys? isit because of that reason? somehow maybe it just affected me. but i cant do anything to change it either right? why must one given something and then being taken back? isnt this hurting? sigh. wondering how would i do if i continue this way. please wake up and get into more serious work!!
met up with huimin again! hee. just felt so blessed with her by my side(: just love her that much ya. hearing and chatting about poly life. oh man. i wonder how would i survive if i really go into poly. all the presentation stuff will just kill me. ya. i really agree. poly students must really have initiative. haa. that shows how my min have become even more mature(: loves!
why must good things happen to one side? why cant both side got what they want? we are happy to hear from each other the desirable things. but another would always feel disappointed thinking of it. cause its never once we could share the pleasing moments at the same time. its just an opposite. we've noticed it. anyway. cheer up my dear.both of us will be at your side ya. cause i just love you so much!(:

somethings just kept me going. (:
thanksthatyouhaveappreciate.smile.

vonmissesyou.
1006pm

I WAS SPEECHLESS BY YOUR WORDS, NO DOUBT THEY ARE UNSPOKEN.

vonmissesyou.
1004pm

ya. i once said. one should not ask for more. should appreciate everything we have even if its just a minute or second. i've asked myself this. have i really appreciated? or have i been asking for more? i cant answer this myself. words are always contradicting. been think alot during that time. time might pass. but i wont grumble at all. yupp. cause is not always, you see. ya. one might not be happy for it. but it's really alright for me cause i dont mind(: sigh. this is not what i have expected. just abit disappointed with it. been thinking ways to help it. might not be perfect. just my thought anyway. ya. people wont express out their feelings at times. but i really wish what she said is true. at least i know its being appreciated. been thinking and chatting alot. i just dont know why too. i am seriously hook to it. i guess i cant bring myself back to who i am. been trying hard to let go sometimes, but there's just something stopping me. is really hard. maybe i'm just giving myself excuses not to. i've read it. ya. seriously i can feel what the feeling is like. and i knew something that i dont wish to know. but i just cant stop myself for not viewing anything. but after that. what i will always got is just disappointment. why am i creating so much trouble and making myself feel so worst. althought i dont know but definetely i'm just being envy of one. but i guess i'm not the only one. i understand how stress and sick things has turn out. but i really dont wish this to carry on. cause it really hurts. apology and comforting is the only thing one can do. i'm seriously in doubt with myself. silence, tears, thoughts has always come together as one when one is alone in the night. its always a different person when one is out in the day. there's always a invisible mask for one to cover. none will see it. unless you are one who also wores it. tears will slowly become dry as the day pass. i really wonder what if one day things were to happen that way when most dont wished to. how would things turn out? who are the one who will accept it? what are the others going to do? oh man. seriously if that day really come. things will gonna be a real chaotic. life is not just looking at how well the result is. but rather is the journey you have walked before. cause its the most memorable time you will definetely hold dear.


vonmissesyou.
1134pm.

recaping of all the things that have happen. everything just seems so real and clear. as if everything was just few days back. but in fact. it had past long ago. thinking back was the only thing i could do. dont expect me to look forward. cause its impossible. never ever thought of it at that very moment. but things just turn out the way. its the second time. althought not the first. but i guess i wont be regreting for this choice i have made at the very moment. althought we cannot predict what will happen next nor we can predict what will we be like the next moment. but i can make this very clearly that from the very moment till now. i have never once regreted the path i chose. people do question me and persuade me. but i guess this is not something we can control. ya i know. all of them meant well for me. but this are always easy to say than to put into action. sometimes i really wonder. am i really looking forward for that particular day. so what if it arrives upon my waiting? nothing gonna change still. ya. days will become months and slowly then year. so what's the big deal after all? one might gain something or one might lose something? nothing gonna change right? but still, its just a day for people to remember and think of. i'm not aware of the things that had been happening. i just hope things would always be fine for you. yupp. moments spent will always be memorable. maybe thats the only gift we were given. althought time spent might not be long. but definitely the memories was worth treasuring. when will there be a day when things will turn out the other way round. but i doubt it wont. who is the one who often shed tears silently. no one would ever know the answer. but just themselves.

vonmissesyou.
240407
1012pm

same old routine for saturday. went to school early in the morning for dnt. ya. goodness. late for 15mins. haa. luckily mrlim never make a fuss out of me. phew* headed home for tuition then went to meet up with pam and ahya for homework session. oh man. perhaps. this gonna be my permanent weekend plan until Os is over. sigh. nvm. must work doubly hard this year. (: our hardwork will pay off. yupp. actually having mj session with my dears at night. but didnt turn up. man. wondering when will i be meeting them again? i seriously miss them can. just got so much to chat with them. ya. headed to meet ahya and pam at bk. studied there, didnt really completed much hw today. so tml gonna meet up with min! gonna study first then movie. hee. imissher!! ya. she introduced banana frap to me. ya. it taste nice, but still prefer my java chip. wahaha. had neo-print with both my sweets. this is the first time we three took pic. haa. love those decorations done by us. (: ya. pertatically, we used 2hrs? just to decorate it. haha. there's always laughter with this two crazy sweets around. kept arguing and fighting with each other. but both just love each other too much. lols.
friday's dinner at marina was definitely a enjoyable moment i would not forget. YTCD is just so fun and loving. its never a mistake to step into YTCD. all the members and teachers are just like a big family. i've gone through and learn alot from them. not just in our dance, but also our character.ya.msTan was just so ps when in the bus they sang the song : we say thank you! (: loves and misses seniors,juniors,teachers,DANCE.
i dont know what i'm thinking at that moment.but seriously.i dont have any intention.ya.i seriously felt happy for you guys.and i've never regreted at all.

i smiled beacuse of you.every little thing that you do.meant alot to me.imuseriously.
vonmissesyou.
0131am

looking back at the time we've been training. time really flies. syf is over. and we've just gotten the result this afternoon. ya. all of us was just waiting for the result. been thinking if we are able to retain gold. ya. indeed we got ourselves a gold back. but all of us seems to be rather disappointed. cause we've set our target to gold of honour. have we been putting in effort and training hard? yesh we did. its just zero point something to get a gold of honour. is it ture? perhaps. even mstan dont bear to tell us the real result. how could we stop our tears from rolling down? our heart really sank. ya. its not the matter of being strong or. ya. people might think that whats the problem with us when we've gotten a gold and yet we are crying. not everyone can understand how we feel. its really hard to explain too. no matter what. at least we're still able to reatin gold. ya. juniors got to work hard for the next syf, not just retaining gold. but get a gold of honour. ya. time flies.looking back of what we have been through this few months. its really heartwarming. all of us had been through thick and thin. the time we laugh, train and sweat, scolding and praising by msLi and msTan, sleeping and eating in dance studio.. for all this moments i will really kept them deep in my memories. just love YTCD to bits and pieces. all my seniors and juniors are just my beloved. will definitely miss those time. looking forward for the stemboat and dance camp. (:
all the tears thats drop regarding of dance,its all worthwhile.cause all this really mean alot to me. -jasmine,kuanyi,kuanwai,zoe,peimei,sharmaine,yanni,felicia. you guys have definitely been a great junior. love you guys lots. its the second neo-print. and not forgetting all those pic we've took. love them all. hearts.
I LOVE YISHUN TOWN DANCE!!

been meeting pamie and ahya to school every morning. ahya is just so sweet to travel down to yishun just to meet us. ya. love her as well. mid year is coming. both of you better work hard ya. definitely will meet up during weekends to study. haa. we three just cant be seperated. loves!
had not been meeting up with my 2 dear euu n and. really had lots of things to catch up with you guys. we've just been too busy with our own things. even we are just a few floor away, but we've yet to meet up for weeks! man. ): really miss them damn lots. so you agree with my sentence?
we are so near but yet so far.
ya. this coming sun gonna meet up with min! i'm looking forward to sun. ((: movie!! chitchatting!! gossiping!! ya. craving for all this with my min. missyou!

looks like i'm missing so many people in a day. sigh. most of the time spent now is in school. Os this year. so got to work hard. got to put aside all the other things. and to be focus in my studies. yupp. i'm sorry if i spend less time with anyone of you.

youaretheoneimissthemost.

vonmissesyou.
1142am

13april. its bad friday? perhaps. hmm. nearly late for school this morning. just for today. and got to squeeze in the bus when actually its already so packed. ya. dont wanna be late so got to bear with it. singaporean is just so.. *shakehead* spotcheck of fingernails again. ''no. have to cut completely.'' man. i'm already getting frustrated with this little thing. and please. i dont need someone to cut for me. even you are a principal. just spoil my day early in the morning.
things always didnt turns out the way we wanted. man. i really dunno what to do at that moment. just a simple thought i have to end my week with all the sweetz. but everything just crops up with a misunderstanding? sometimes i really dunno what to do. maybe being the good party may not always be the right choice. is just how people look at it. nevermind. things still turns out fine in the end.
dance practise for today was pretty alright. a short practise. haa. but tml gonna be a long day. oh please. i wont grumble anymore. cause its gonna be my last practise. sigh. looking back at those times really make me miss them more. even if the time spent together is less than half a year. but theres definitely lots of memories i will cherish. i know one day it will definitely come to an end. therefore i always cherish the moments we had. just hoping all will keep in touch. ya. looking forward to another shopping spree. wondering when. i just hold so dear of that particular neoprint i had with these sweetz.
had a long chat with my min.haa. missher damn lots.glad to hear about her orientation stuffs.ya. poly life gonna start for her soon. means. gonna make new friends. haa. thats something she dont like. changing of new environment. but things would turn out fine for you after days. just *never you dare forget me! haa.
pretty disappointed with one. ya. is one own freedom to choose. but i dont see that trust or the feeling one had given me. might look clean and nice at the outside, but there wouldnt be any content or colour if one doesnt even add that. afterall it would still be a brand new book without any content. so whats the use of having it?
gave something to my love ones this morning.including sweetie. ya. the letter say most. hearts(:
theres just so many people for me to love and care of. this is something i dont like or wish that to happen, is that there's always a time to leave your love ones. thats life. ya.

vonmissesyou.
0117am

oh man. how slack can i be? been popping in and out of my bro's room to use the com. is like i can't get my butt seated down when doing homework at home. thats a wrong decision to stay at home to complete my work. and tomorrow got to hand in 30 page of DD. and what am i doing right now? blogging! man. i've been finding things to do instate of doing my homework. and i'll definetly gain weight when i'm at home. been eating non stop. tsktsk. got to stop this bad habit of mine. ya. PAM, please ask me out to do my homework!!! haha. better ask my bro to be back early, so as to stop me from using com for the next few hours. alright. back to some serious work.
april fool day~
i didnt get into any of their trick ya. haa. von is just so smart(:

vonmissesyou.
0942pm

ya. finally i'm back to post after so long. just wanna keep my blog updated. yupp. (:
been really busy this few weeks. had lot of dance practises and homework to do. i'm basically just busy with school stuffs. speech day's approaching. i'm looking forward. hoping to see my dearest dancemates. but i know some are just too busy with theirs JC life. at least we met up last week? for the stemboat. haa. just love them so much. got lots of things to chat and gossip about when we came together. the laughter and crazyness we had, i always hold dear.
ya. thanks min for the sweets stuff you gave me. been thinking lately. but i just love you that much even..
syf coming in a weeks time. are we preapared? i guess so. we just got to do our very best on 16april. yupp. are we able to retain gold? no one can answer that. ya. is indeed stressful. but no matter what. we cant give up(: stand down after syf. ya. this is what we are looking for this year. but there's always good and bad point. really gonna miss the times we had during our practises. the time we slack during our warm up, the time we eat during rest time, the time we sleep...
sigh. all good things comes to an end. ya. definitely gonna miss those times.
looking back and then i realise. time is really precious. would i be able to finish that? i'm not slacking anymore. all i need is time. weekdays been packed with school work, and weekend been pack with school work too. man. never mind. just try my best to do whatever i can.

vonmissesyou.
0215pm